Being in a trial room often makes one feel like being on trial. Guilty as charged for trying on a pair of jeans that refuses to button up. For the cellulite on our thighs and the stretch marks on our stomachs. For the neck that’s too deep, the dress that’s too short, the top that’s too tight, and there goes our belief that we know our own body. We walk out of that room leaving all our self-love behind. We look at the woman in line behind us at Starbucks and hate her glowing skin. We scroll through Instagram and scowl at pictures of women with luscious hair. We open a fashion magazine and mope over the dresses that will never fit us.
We weigh ourselves up against such unrealistic beauty standards that we are left feeling downright ugly. We forget that beauty is about a lot more than what meets the eye.
It was easier to not get sucked into this cyclone for our mothers. They never had to stroll through a fashion store where garments come in fixed sizes. In their times, clothes were made-to-measure. The tailor down the road knew exactly how to style their necklines and where exactly to add a stitch and accentuate those curves. The secret to a healthy skin was not expensive parlour dates but easy homemade remedies and zero access to fast food. If you ever wonder why when your mother drapes a saree, she walks with a style you can never carry, it’s because she grew up loving herself. Of course, she had her own set of setbacks but there were fewer things plaguing her concept of beauty.
And it might seem difficult right now, but you too can stop being so hard on yourself.
End the comparison. Like apples, women too come in all shapes and sizes. But that doesn’t make one any sweeter than the other.
Confidence is attractive. A confident woman is way more appealing than a woman swallowed in self-pity. Ditch those fancy pumps, strap up your comfy shoes and walk like you own the world.
Flex those muscles. Pick an exercise of your choice and follow it religiously. Look up some Pilate lessons on YouTube, join a yoga class, or simply go for a brisk walk.
Find your beauty. Start your mornings by looking for the little things in your body that you love. The tiny birth mark that makes you unique. Your smile that looks so much like your father’s. The shoe-bite your favourite heels blessed you with when you killed it on the dance-floor.
Buy something sexy. Treat yourself to some hot lingerie even if you have no one to show it off to. When your goodies are happy, you are happy.
Spend time with your people. It’s easier to love yourself when you are surrounded with love.
Follow your passion. Channel your energy in doing something that makes you happy.
And most importantly, accept and love your body.
Having a healthy body image is of utmost importance if you want to be successful. Because the way you think and feel about yourself reflects in the way others think and feel about you.
- Vedangi Dandwate (Author) Writer, Blogger, Artist & Feminist